I Can't Help Myself. This Is A Problem.

August 16, 2014

So, with my tender sensibilities all bruised by Steven Moffat and his careless, cryptic words, I felt the need to share with you one of the most amazing videos done by a Sherlock and  Molly fan I have ever found. Nyah86Production, you deserve to work on television. Like Bones. Or Grey's Anatomy. Or something. 

All the dialogue between the characters in this video came from the series. As did all the clips. My favorite part? The look on Sherlock's face after Molly says the words, "I don't count." It just makes something inside my chest twist. Bravo Benedict Cumberbatch. This is why you will always be my favorite Sherlock Holmes. 

Enjoy.

On Sherlock And Molly And Why Steven Moffat Is One Confusing Bastard

August 15, 2014

NOTE: It has come to my attention, re-reading this post while I'm composing it, that I may perhaps sound like a crazy,obsessive nerd during the course of this whole endeavor. If you don't want to read about things both excessively nerdy and (although I hate to say this) excessively fan-girly, then I suggest you find something better to do with your Internet. Like buying things on Amazon. And stalking people on Facebook. Whatever you "cool" and un-nerdy people do with your Internet. Right. Onwards then!


I think that I have mentioned in passing that from time to time I delve into the dark recesses of the Internet where Fanfiction resides. I usually keep these times to myself, typically being in a mood that is not conducive to socialization, but this time I cannot hold it in and keep it to myself. And it is because Steven Moffat is an utterly cryptic bastard. Curse you Steven Moffat!

Ah yes. I should probably explain this. 

First pertinent point: I have dived into the world of Sherlock Fanfiction. And it can be a dark and scary place if you don't watch yourself (although this is to be expected from a TV show featuring unusual murders, a Consulting Criminal, a female dominatrix, and which has a highly functioning sociopath -his words, not mine- for a main character). 

Oh, and as an aside, if you haven't seen the BBC modern adaptation of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's infamous character, for God's sake, WATCH IT! All three seasons are on Netflix. When I heard that the next season wasn't coming out until 20-frigging-16 I about collapsed into a puddle of utter despair. This show makes me laugh, makes me shout, makes me weep, makes me want to put bullets in things, and oddly enough makes me want to snog the bejeezus out of Sherlock Holmes because, as Irene Adler once said, "Brainy's the new sexy."

Second, and no less pertinent, point: I am a huge fan of Molly Hooper, who is the only regular character on the show that is not from Doyle's original works. Which I think is one of the most amazing things about the show. There are so many reasons to love Molly Hooper. How do I count the ways? I can't. The amazingness is unlimited. Suffice to say that while I don't feel like I would ever personally act like Molly, she is complex enough, intelligent enough, funny enough, and just plain awesome enough that when I read Fanfiction, the only kind that I can bring myself to read is one where: A) Molly is one of the main characters, and B) Paired with Sherlock Holmes. Because their relationship is just offbeat yet adorable enough that it makes me want to squeal like some kind of teenage girl every time I see them interact on screen. (Alright, not every time. But most times. And if I'm not squealing, I'm wanting to smack Sherlock in the face. Which Molly did by the way! See?! AWESOMENESS!)

Erhm. Yes. Anyways.

Third point (and probably the one you were wondering about): Steven Moffat. The creative genius whom I would like to hurt very badly in numerous creative ways. He is one of the primary creators/writers of the show. The other being Mark Gattis, the show's co-creator who also plays Sherlock's older brother Mycroft. Who is so delightfully snarky and just a tad bit evil. But back to Moffat. 

I was happy with Moffat. He helped create one of my absolute favorite adaptations of my favorite detective of all time. And he had the good sense to cast Benedict Cumberbatch as Sherlock Holmes! And then I read an interview that he did after Season Three was aired, talking about Sherlock and where it was going and blah, blah, blah... That's not important right now. He screwed it all up at the end and now I'm pissed at him. Steven Moffat, I hope you accidentally take a tumble off a very steep hillside. Not a cliff, because I don't want you dead before you fix this, but I wouldn't be opposed to some severe maiming and general discomfort. 

So Moffat is talking about Molly Hooper's evolution as a character and her role in Sherlock's mind palace when he's shot (really guys, watch this show, now!) and I'm all happy thinking I'm going to get some kind of answer or hint from his response that will hold me until 20-freaking-16! when Moffat opens his fat gob and says this:

"She’s developed hugely. She wasn’t even meant to come back after her first appearance, but she worked so well. Louise Brealey [actress who plays Molly Hooper] was so good. The girl with the unrequited crush became the first person to make Sherlock apologize in “A Scandal in Belgravia,” and then you see it really shift around. Whereas all of Sherlock’s emotion on the rooftop when he’s talking to John in “The Reichenbach Fall” is completely faked — he’s just trying to give his friend a bad time so he’ll be in an emotional state to believe what’s about to happen — the emotion when Sherlock turns up to Molly in that episode and says “I need you,” I mean, it’s amazing everyone didn’t just get it right there. For God’s sake, what do you think he’s thinking about? He’s gone to a woman who works in a morgue — what do you think happens next? So she’s become one of a very small select band of people he absolutely trusts. And he adores Molly, of course he does. He loves her. I don’t think she has the same sort of crush on him anymore. She’s fascinated by him, but she knows that’s not who she actually wants to end up with. She properly cares about him — and gets angry at him, and tells him off. It’s revealing that she’s in his mind palace. She’s one of the people he keeps himself up to the mark with."

I took this interview from vulture.com, by the way. Hope that's enough to avoid plagiarism and all that rot. Back to the real problem here.

WHAT THE CRAP DOES HE MEAN "What do you think happens next?" and "It's amazing that everyone doesn't get it right there"? THAT IS NOT CLEAR AT ALL, STEVEN MOFFAT! And this following the words, "For God's sake, what do you think he's thinking about?" CURSE YOU STEVEN MOFFAT AND YOUR AMBIGUOUS WORD CHOICE AND SENTENCE CONSTRUCTION! 

And then, and then! He goes and says, "He loves her." Just like that. No elaboration. No... expansion upon the subject. He just then goes on to talk about how Molly OBVIOUSLY doesn't love Sherlock that way anymore and that OF COURSE she doesn't want to end up with him. YOU DID NOT MAKE THIS CLEAR, STEVEN MOFFAT! AND I AM EXTREMELY PEEVED THAT YOU ARE MAKING THIS DECISION. 

Besides, why not let her marry "Meat Dagger" Tom if she's not all hung up on Sherlock anymore, hmmm? And what's with all the confusing glances and letting her freaking SLAP SHERLOCK IN THE FACE?! Agh!!! 

And if that's not evil enough... You just had to end it with a little hint. The smallest crumb that might indicate a shift in their relationship. "It's revealing that she's in his mind palace," he says. Pox on you, Steven Moffat. Pox. On. You.

Herein ends my rant about Steven Moffat. May he be munched on by flesh eating beetles and dropped in a tar pit. Back to my Fanfiction I go, to nurse my wounds and pretend that Steven Moffat isn't such a complete and utter arse. I'll see you all when I resurface. 

And for goodness sakes, watch Sherlock! Because otherwise I'm afraid you all are going to think that I've completely lost my mind. And I haven't. I've just stressed it a bit. 

Relevancy Found Within Haikus (Among Other Things)

August 13, 2014

Today is a day for thoughts. Here are some which seem relevant to me, as of now. 

"Many solemn nights 

Blond moon, we stand and marvel...

Sleeping our noons away”

-Teitoku

“Everyone of us is shadowed by an illusory 

person: a false self..We are not very good at 

recognizing illusions, least of all the ones we 

cherish about ourselves. (34)

 

Contemplation is not and cannot be a 

function of this external self. There is an 

irreducible opposition between the deep 

transcendent self that awakens only in 

contemplation, and the superficial, external 

self which we commonly identify with the 

first person singular.(7) 

Our reality, our true self, is hidden in what 

appears to us to be nothingness....We can rise 

above this unreality and recover our hidden 

reality....(281)"

― Thomas Merton, New Seeds of 

Contemplation

“The painter Kramskoy has a remarkable 

painting entitled The Contemplator: it depicts 

a forest in winter, and in the forest, standing 

all by himself on the road, in deepest solitude, 

a stray little peasant in a ragged caftan and 

bast shoes; he stands as if he were lost in 

thought, but he is not thinking, he is 

"contemplating" something. If you nudged 

him, he would give a start and look at you as 

if he had just woken up, but without 

understanding anything. It's true that he 

would come to himself at once, and yet, if he 

were asked what he had been thinking about 

while standing there, he would most likely 

not remember, but would most likely keep 

hidden away in himself the impression he 

had been under while contemplating. These 

impressions are dear to him, and he is most 

likely storing them up imperceptibly and even 

without realizing it--why and what for, he 

does not know either; perhaps suddenly, 

having stored up his impressions over many 

years, he will drop everything and wander off 

to Jerusalem to save his soul, or perhaps he 

will suddenly burn down his native village, or 

perhaps he will do both. 

There are a good many "contemplatives" 

among our peasants. And Smerdyakov was 

probably one of them. And he was probably 

greedily hoarding up his impressions, hardly 

knowing why.” 

― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers 

Karamazov

Ok... Just One More, I Promise! (False. Make That Two.)

August 2, 2014

Okay, so I realize this makes me like five kinds of a nerd (or a dweeb, or whichever awkward person vocabulary term you wish to employ...) but I couldn't help myself. 

This one is called "The Poetry Prize," I believe, also a sketch from the television series "A Bit of Fry and Laurie." My favorite part?

Headmaster: "I suppose I am one of the 'unhappy bubbles of anal wind popping and winking in the mortal bath,' am I? .... Oh your silence tells me everything, I am! I am an unhappy bubble of anal wind!"

Student: "It's just how I see it, that's valid."

Headmaster: "Valid? Valid? We're not talking about a banknote, you are calling your headmaster an 'unhappy bubble of anal wind!'"

Oh, dang it. I just can't help myself. Here's the last one. It is called "Sexual Intercourse."

I can't even pick a favorite part of this one... Except maybe the oft repeated phrase, "Sexual intercourse can often bring about pregnancy in the adult female." Oh the horror!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xmb1DT62FVc

I'm terribly sorry, but I cannot get this one to load on its own. But don't let that deter you from watching it!

'Merica

August 2, 2014

I have a new favorite television show on Netflix. Why is it that I can only find my kind of humor on television when it is being broadcast on the BBC?

I present... Hugh Laurie's Song for America from "A Bit of Fry and Laurie"